Thursday, January 17, 2008

Life Lesson - expectations

Yesterday was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I was basically told that I was a child. And while I am not a child, and did not act in a childish way (although admittedly, I can and have in the past), it was hidden expectations put on me that I did not live up to that made me look like a child in this person's eyes. If I had simply been told what was expected of me, I could have lived up to it.

And I suddenly was very convicted. How many times have my children done something and I thought "How STUPID! Why don't thy think?!?!" (Yes, I am admitting that I times I can be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad mother.) And yet, have they been trained? Have they been taught? Or do I have hidden expectations that make them fall short because I have not shared with them?

I know not everyone will agree with me. But sometimes I think a child just needs to be told how to do or not do something. That it doesn't just "come to them." And that I as a mom cannot expect my children to automatically know how to do things. I need to tell them and if I don't tell them, I cannot be angry when they don't use common sense. They don't have the common sense at an early age not to touch hot. We tell them not to touch and then it becomes common sense.

IF only I can remember that in every area/aspect of their lives. :)

Although can anyone tell me when common sense comes? I am so ready for my children to have it in every area of their life. :)

1 comment:

BarbaraLee said...

I think it comes around 10 to 13 years of age. But then I have a 18 yr. old boy who doesn't want to grow up. That is why you are the parent and they are the children. It gets better just as long as you actually stick with. Remember our great grandparents got married a 16 I think there is some hope. We can let kids be kids but as long as you have the basics and they know what the house rules are there is no reason common sense isn't used. As long as there is no blood or anyone gets hurt you should be o.k.