Starting The New Year Right

I have tried and tried and TRIED all sorts of things to keep this house clean. Store bought and homemade just to help the girls stay on top of their chores. Even having them pay each other to do their work if they did not get it done. All either didn't work, or worked for a short while, then fizzled out.

FINALLY I have something that works! :D :D :D We have been doing it for two weeks now, and I can say I am happy happy HAPPY!

I have shared before about how I took some things from Flylady. Each child has their own zone in the house (a room they are in charge of making sure stays clean and orderly). And since they all share a room, the room is divided into zones and each child is responsible for keeping their room zone clean (which includes their bed). We also made a rule that there are no toys in the room, and no books in the room. They may have a book they are currently reading near their bedside, but not the plethora of books that they used to bring in there (I love that my girls love books, but BOY it was getting BAD).

The other thing that is the REAL key to this is to make sure things revolve around meals. I know it sounds silly and simple. And maybe it is, but it WORKS!

Each chore is written on a card. It is broken down into easy steps (especially the younger the child). MM cannot read yet, so she also has pictures on her card that we worked through together to help give her clues as to what the card says.

The cards are on the TO DO side, and once a card is completed, it is moved to the ALL DONE side. Easy Peasy, huh?


The names are blocked out for privacy reasons. Each child has their own color for their cards.

So there are before breakfast chores which, if everything was done like it should, should only take about 15 minutes to complete.
MAKE BED
TIDY ROOM ZONE
GET DRESSED AND BRUSH HAIR
(Because EE's zone is the kitchen, she has to unload the dishwasher so it is ready to load with dishes from the day, starting with breakfast dishes)

Then after breakfast chores:
CLEAR SPOT AT TABLE (they each eat on a tray like from school cafeteria and they leave the tray and their cup to be used for each meal in their spot, but make sure their tray is clean and clear and their spot at the table is clean and clear - dishes put directly into dishwasher)
BEGIN SCHOOLWORK
(Again with EE's Zone being the kitchen, she has extra after the meal, so while above is for all children, below is just for the kitchen zone)
SINK CLEAN AND CLEAR (again the Flylady clean sink thing)
COUNTERS CLEAR AND WIPED DOWN
CHAIRS AT THE COUNTER CLEAR (sometimes the chairs at the kitchen counter are used as a hot spot to collect items)
WIPE DOWN TABLE
WIPE DOWN CHAIRS/BENCHES (if needed)

Then before you eat lunch:
CLEAN UP SCHOOLWORK
ZONE CHECK - CLEAN AND CLEAR

Then after you eat lunch:
CLEAR SPOT AT TABLE (leaving only tray and cup)
(Again with EE's Zone being the kitchen, she has extra after the meal, so while above is for all children, below is just for the kitchen zone)
SINK CLEAN AND CLEAR (again the Flylady clean sink thing)
COUNTERS CLEAR AND WIPED DOWN
CHAIRS AT THE COUNTER CLEAR (sometimes the chairs at the kitchen counter are used as a hot spot to collect items)
WIPE DOWN TABLE
WIPE DOWN CHAIRS/BENCHES (if needed)
RUN A RINSE ON THE DISHWASHER (we do not rinse our dishes, so this is not a waste of water, but helping to keep the dishes moist so the food washes off them)

This next set of chores are called the 4:30PM chores simply because that is when we start them. They look like a lot, but honestly, it is mostly upkeep. These chores, if the girls have been keeping up with everything, these chores (except for Friday, more on that in a minute), take no more than 30 minutes to do EACH DAY! They are based on each child's zones, as well as another job they have been given the responsibility for. On Friday's, it is major cleaning day, so in their zones, extra responsibilities, and bedroom, deeper cleaning is done - this adds about 30-45 minutes to cleaning during this time. The reward of getting this done sooner rather than later, is that when you are done, you are able to sit and listen to an audio book or audio theatre.

Everyone's have these 4:30PM chores in common:
ALL TOYS, GAMES, BOOKS AND SCHOOLWORK BACK WHERE THEY BELONG - NICE AND ORDERLY
CHECK ROOM: BED MADE AND ROOM ZONE CLEAR
CLEAN 15 ITEMS IN BASEMENT
2 ITEM GIVEAWAY (this is our decluttering, once the child has done a decent job, this will not be needed but maybe once a week)
ZONE CHECK - CLEAN AND CLEAR

MM's extra responsibility is the hallway upstairs between the children's bedrooms
CHECK HALLWAY - NO TRASH, NO CLOTHES, NO TOYS
FRIDAY!!! VACUUM ZONE, BEDROOM, HALLWAY and JJ'S ROOM

EE's extra job is the children's bathroom. She has one card with everything broken down as to what is expected. The front looks like this:
SINK CLEAN AND CLEAR
COUNTERS CLEAN AND ORDERLY
EMPTY TRASH IF NEEDED
FLOOR CLEAN AND CLEAR (behind toilet too)
FLUSH POTTY (if needed)

The back of the card is for Friday cleaning and looks like this
FRIDAY!!!
SCRUB TUB
WASH TOWELS (the hamper for dirty bath towels is in their bathroom)
FOLD AND PUT AWAY WASHED TOWELS
SCRUB TOILET
SWEEP FLOOR
PUT CLEAN TOWEL ON ROD

AA's extra job is the main bathroom (which is small, but important that it looks nice because guests use it), and the entry way (again, important that it looks nice so that guests feel welcome. On Friday, she vacuums her zone and the stairs going upstairs.
ENTRYWAY: CLEAN AND ORDERLY - NOTHING ON FLOOR
MAIN BATHROOM: SINK CLEAN AND CLEAR, COUNTERS CLEAN AND ORDERLY, EMPTY TRASH IF NEEDED, FLOOR CLEAN AND CLEAR and if it is FRIDAY!!!! SRUB TOILET, PUT OLD TOWEL IN HAMPER UPSTAIRS TO BE WASHED AND PUT CLEAN TOWEL ON ROD

After dinner chores are a bit different because instead of eating in the kitchen, we are eating in the dining room, which is part of AA's zone:
CLEAN ENTIRE SPOT INTO DISHWASHER
WASH AND DRY TRAY AND PUT IN TRAY SPOT (there is a spot where the trays belong)
Kitchen chores (for EE):
MAKE SURE KITCHEN TABLE COMPLETELY CLEAR (no trays)
WIPE TABLE
WIPE DOWN CHAIRS/BENCHES (no only if needed, this is to be done)
PUT ALL NAPKINS INTO DIRTY HAMPER
CLEAR KITCHEN FLOOR (nothing should be on the floor)
SWEEP KITCHEN FLOOR (under and around table, stove, fridge, etc.)
SINK CLEAN AND CLEAR
WIPE STOVETOP DOWN
POTS AND PANS WASHED AND HUNG TO DRY
COUNTERS CLEAR AND WIPED DOWN
AFTER ALL DISHES ARE PUT IN DISHWASHER, RUN THE LOAD WITH SOAP
(Dining room chores for AA):
MAKE SURE DINING TABLE COMPLETELY CLEAR (no trays)
WIPE TABLE
WIPE DOWN CHAIRS
PUT ALL NAPKINS INTO DIRTY HAMPER
CLEAR FLOOR UNDER AND AROUND TABLE
VACUUM (whoever thought of carpet in a dining room?!?!) FLOOR

Bedtime Routine:
PUT ON NIGHTIE
GO POTTY
GET DRINK
BRUSH TEETH
BRUSH HAIR

OK... all this has been working GREAT! Like I said, the key is to revolve around meals instead of times. If something HAS to be done before you eat, it will be done. This is especially nice for me, who does NOT do well on a schedule and likes things to be flexible. If things get REALLY hectic through the day, or we are gone for most of the day, as long as the 4:30 and after dinner jobs get done, the house stays clean. The other times for jobs are really just checks to make sure things are being stayed up on.

NOW I just need to make ME one of these things. :D And have the kids help keep me accountable! Exercise, school planning, cleaning my room, laundry, finances/computer time, cooking the meals, training the kids to cook meals, sewing (I plan on sewing AA's wardrobe this year WITH her help!), scrapping (this is something that I might just call art and we al do ART doing school time).

CHEC - Preparing Daughters For Marriage

Preparing Daughters for Marriage Panel Discussion

Speakers: Stacy and James McDonald, Vicki Lewis and Little Bear Wheeler

How to have your daughter's heart?

*be VERY careful that your instructions are NOT taken as criticism - especially if your daughter has an inclination towards a wounded spirit.

*repent to her when you make a mistake (this goes for boys too).

Most important thing for a daughter to know?

*God loves them

While daughters are waiting...?

*train train train them! They should know how to be a homemaker, clean house, care for children, be nurturing, be gracious,

and boys by the way should know how to be a provider, loyal, faithful, trustworthy and a hard worker

*one day they will be taking over their own home

*serve others - use your skills to serve others - nursing home, meals for widows, caring for children for others

What are some questions to ask suitors?

*James McDonald has a list of 120+ questionnaire he has the man fill out. He is not necessarily looking for right or wrong answers, but wants to know if his daughter is worth it. If the young man is willing to do the questionnaire, then that let's him know that the young man feels his daughter is worth it.

*the goal of courtship or dating should always be marriage

*the guy needs to date the dad first.

How do you protect your daughters heart?

*young men should come to the dad first

*dad's should know it is hard work to protect her heart, and to not be lazy

*mom's - have your daughters share what other men say and do to/with your daughter. A young girl may take the fact that the man sat next to her to mean something more than it actually was. She might also take something he said to mean something that it was not said to mean. When he smiles at you and says "hi" that is not code for "I love you." :D

Current Web Readings

Yardsale Treasure Map
This is GREAT!! It will plan out a route for you to hit garage sales near you! Helps save on gas because you make a full circle! WOW!!! :D

The True Vine by Andrew Murray
First, if you have not read anything by Andrew Murray, you are missing out. Secondly, this 31 day devotional (which can be done in less than 5 minutes a day!) is a very in depth study of John 15:1-16. I actually have a copy of this book (gotten off PaperBack Swap for free). But this link goes to a free online copy that you can print out if yo wish, or just read on the computer.

God's Littler Princess Ballet
OH how I wished I lived closer!!! If you have a daughter and live near here, you should check it out!

Free Homemaking Lessons
SWEET! HT: The Old Schoolhouse Magazine on FaceBook

Free Biblical Word Fill-In Puzzles
I LOVE these and they are so hard to find!!! Here are some BIBLICAL ones you can print out and take on vacation this summer!

Speaking of summer...
Entry Fee Waived to National Parks for three weekends during the summer. HT: The Homeschool For Free FaceBook page (don't miss out on the freebies! Join the Homeschool For Free FaceBook page!!!)

Rewards...

I have read and heard many different messages on the whole rewards system. To reward the child for doing what they are supposed to be doing, or NOT to reward the child for something they are supposed to do - THAT is the question.

Of course because some messages were from certain teachers which I liked everything else they said, or they were popular authors/speakers among some of the women I most highly respect and admire, I would follow what their suggestions were.

And depending on what teacher I was into at the time, would determine pretty much what we did. But we have kept a few basic things that we like:

(1) We encourage the children to do their work as unto the Lord - just as if the Lord Himself had asked them and not Mommy or Daddy. We also encourage them NOT to seek our praise for the work they do. We want them to know that there is a heavenly reward and an earthly reward, and encourage them to desire the heavenly reward.

More on that in a moment.

...AND...

(2) We don't do allowance. I know that sounds bad to some. We believe that a child should not be paid for something they are required to do. When they grow up and leave home, they will have to know how to cook and clean and do laundry, and no one will pay them for it. It will be part of their responsibility in caring for themselves (and prayerfully someday, a family).

More on that in a moment too. :)

But I had to think about it. I am training my daughters to be keepers at home. And while they will not get paid for it, and the rewards are much greater than anything on this earth... it is nice to be given thanks. It is nice to be appreciated. And those are things I want my daughters to learn too - thankfulness and appreciation. Not that we will always get it. And when we don't, we still need to work as unto the Lord. But I want them to learn how to show thankfulness and appreciation for others.

So my brilliant beloved came up with a WONDERFUL idea! When the children exhibit a character trait that we truly appreciate (like being exceptionally kind or did a fantabulous job on their chores, or are the only ones NOT whining), he gives them a penny.

Please notice, in following with our above seeking a heavenly reward, we do not want to praise our children so much for the works that they do, but the diligence they showed in doing it, or the cheerfulness they had while doing it. We feel that it is so much more important to praise virtues than works.

Sometimes their work is not the best, but they TRIED their best. They were diligent and persevered while working on their handwriting for school. We want to encourage them to keep doing their best because then their work WILL look nice and neat and respectable.

We found a old gumball machine at a garage sale. My marvelous beloved talked her down to TWO DOLLARS! So they are allowed to take their penny, and put it in the gumball machine and out pops the candy of the month. Sometimes it is M&M's (peanut of course, gotta get SOMETHING healthy in there) or jellybeans or Skittles. Sometimes, if they have exemplified Christ all day they will get like three or four pennies. They LOVE plunking in penny after penny!

It doesn't happen everyday. Sometimes days go by and no one is getting pennies. That let's us know we need to work harder on character issues. The kids have not come to expect it. It i sporadic and random and the girls love it! It is just another way we show appreciation and thankfulness for the character growth and development of our children.

So instead of allowance, how do our kids get money? I will post on that tomorrow! :)

Current Web Readings

March 2009 Growing in Grace Magazine
This BEAUTIFUL magazine is free online and has wonderful articles for your daughters (although I really like them too!). This month's issue has some GREAT links on Purim - coming up soon. If you have never celebrated Purim, you really should look into it.

She Senses Worth of Her Work
YEA! Monica is continuing with her series of crafts based on the Proverbs 31 woman!!! :D WOOHOO!!!

While there, say congrats to Monica for 5 years of wedded bliss! (And try not to be envious that she was able to fit back into her wedding dress!) :D Congrats Monica on fitting into your wedding dress and still amazing your man after 5 years of marriage. Here is to 50 more! :D

Homemade Thursday, What Was That?
She answered - homemade deodorant. Did it work? Read her hilarious review of the recipe to find out!

Fast Foods - the TRUTH
Fast food resturants would LIKE for you to THINK they are offering healthy options, but are they really??

The Happy Minimum
GREAT read!!! HT: Money Saving Mom

Speaking of MSM, she is doing a GREAT series you WON'T want to miss on 100 Different Ways to Save $100 This Year. Here is Part 1.

I will admit that it has only been during this past year that I learned all but ONE of her first 10 ideas. I had not heard about the eye glasses savings, so I am passing that onto beloved today who needs a new pair, and I will be needing a pair myself soon (and no, I don't wear glasses, yet, but I am getting old and cannot see as well as I used to). :) I can truly attest to EVERYTHING she has written in the post (except for the glasses thing). Having a budget, paying cash only, and using the envelope system haas worked for us INCREDIBLY well! We have saved SO MUCH MONEY! It has been GREAT!!! Not only were we able to cut our grocery budget, but we were able to get HEALTHY NOURISHING foods! I hope she talks about stockpiling. It has been a GREAT saver for us! For more on our journey about what we have learned about finances, click the FINANCES tab under this post (or on the sidebar).

Current Web Readings

Learning How To Set The Table
What an adorable and heroic story, perfect for little girls AND boys, about how to remember where to put your knife and fork.

Library Resources For Young Ladies
Good list of books!

Make Your Own Dryer Balls
OK. I love Monica! I wish she were my sister! I will settle for her being a friend. :) And I just LOVE her blog. Normally, when I find a link to something I like, I put the link here with a HT to the source I found the link on, but Monica's blog is just so beautiful, and this post is no different! I LOVE her ideas and her pictures. And how CUTE she wrapped them up as gifts for Christmas. Thank you for sharing Monica!

Cabin Fever and Your Kids
GReat indoor fun things to do with your kids when it is too cold to go outside. :)

Paying Off Debt
Another GREAT post! This is more than just about paying off debt, but changing the way you think about money, wants and needs.

Cornstarch Goo
A tutorial for how to make cornstarch goo and the fun for kids!

Herbal Chicken Stock

Well, I did it!! After talking about chicken tortilla soup, I had to do it!

So here is what I did.

We roasted the chicken (a la Alton Brown).

We took everything he had us cut out (minus all the guts, I just could not bring myself to do anything with them at this time - I hope to get over my fear of the innards soon as I know I want to waste as little as possible), plus all the bones (which my husband lovingly took all the meat off for us to eat that night) and the drippings from the pan.

We then added carrot chunks, celery chunks (with leaves), onion chunks (with skin). Then we followed a recipe for Healthy Herbal Chicken Stock which will help us fight off colds and flu this winter season. They call it a tonic. :)

We have the CD Training Our Daughters To Be Keepers At Home (TOD-KAH). I have created a section for teaching on Herbs and this recipe is going right in there. I have also changed the books we will be using to teach her as I do not have the Sue Gregg books, nor do I want to get them. I have PLENTY of other books just as good that we will be using instead. PLUS, they will be getting hands on training in most of that now and while they are young. :)

The stock simmered all night long! Then in the morning, I made the condensed cream of chicken soup and used some to make the chicken tortilla soup for lunch and froze the rest of the herbal chicken stock and cream of chicken soup. Which is 8 cups of stock (which honestly is about two soups worth for our family), and about 3 cans worth of the cream of chicken soup.

Which brings me to a question. How do you freeze liquids without using plastic? Everything out there I read said to use freezer bags. I am hoping to move away from those. (Although with the success of using cereal bags around the freezer bags I am really happy and liking the ease of freezer bags, especially for things like frozen veggies.) But with soups I would really like to use something NON-plastic. Can I use canning jars? Anyone with any advice?

Sew A Skirt From A Sheet!!

What a GREAT and EASY project to do with your daughters to teach them to sew! And right now with garage sale season it is the PERFECT time to find a sheet. You could also head to the local thrift store if there are not garage sales in your area.

Here is a link to the tutorial.
Sew A Skirt From a Sheet

Post a link if you do it!

Crafting Through Proverbs 31

I have ALWAYS loved Monica's blog, but life got in the way and I only got to read three blogs. WELL, thankfully one of the blogs mentioned a special little gift she got, which brought me back to Monica's blog. AND I AM SO GLAD SHE DID!

I don't know how Monica does it, but she has time, with a new little blessing and all, to come up with the COOLEST IDEA EVER! (Yes, if you don't know by now, I do over exaggerate a LOT. But this idea is honestly a WAY COOL idea!)

Crafting Through Proverbs 31

Wives and Daughters

I recently heard about this book, and saw reviews of the movie, on Homeliving Helper.
Part 1 Part 2a Part 2b Part 3 Part 4

I was able to find FREE audio of this wonderful book! If you like Jane Austen, you will like this book.

Goto Librivox - Wives and Daughters
If you are lucky enough to have iTunes, you can click on the SUBSCRIBE IN iTUNES button and it will take you to the iTunes and start downloading the first chapter. Click GET ALL to get every chapter!! If you do not have iTunes, you can still download the mp3 files, you just have to do it one by one (unless you are lucky enough to use Firefox, you can get the DOWNLOAD THEM ALL extension (free), and then you just click once and it downloads them all).

With Whom Do Your Children Spend Their Time?

Sometimes I am frowned upon by other mothers. I do not allow my children to play unsupervised. I am not the "go play in the basement while Momma fellowships" kind of Momma. I do not even allow the three of my girls to play by themselves. My children are little sinners. And when unsupervised, sin likes to find them out. And I do not want to allow sin to take root in their heart because I was too selfish and wanted some "grown-up" or "me" time.

I am also VERY particular about who I allow my children to be with right now while they are young and impressionable. They are still like wet cement. Anything that happens to them will leave an impression in them. I want their impressions to be things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report and has virtue.

I remember so many times my parents allowed me to chose the friends I hung out with. And I know the struggles I have today as a result of things I learned, heard and did with those "friends." I do not want my children to have the same struggles.

I know that this world is not a perfect world. And there are people in the world that my children will have to encounter that do not love God, and that are not respectful people. And I will train my children on how to show God's love to them. But just as I would not chose them for a friend or to hang out with, I too want to teach my children how to pick wise friendships. Ones that will encourage and edify her and ones that she can help encourage and edify. That is not to say that you cannot share God's love with those whom you would not chose to befriend. Just be wise in whom you spend the majority of your time with. Redeeming their time wisely. Another verse.

A friend of mine has the PERFECT analogy of why it is so important to root our children in the truth of God's word at a young age before allowing them to be exposed to the world.

Bankers, when they are being trained are only trained with real money. They become so familiar with real money that they know exactly how real money sounds, feels, smells and looks. They are not given any counterfeits to work with. Only real, honest, truthful money. When they are released to work in the bank, they are so familiar and rooted in what real money is, that they can quickly and easily spot the counterfeits!

I believe it is the same way with our children. You want your child so rooted in God's word and truth, that when the enemy throws a lie at them, anything contrary to God's word would send off alarms in the child as something that is not true. At that point you can talk to the child about what that lie is, why it is a lie, and end again with God's truth.

Sometimes that means that I lose a possible friendship with another mother. Sometimes it means I am ridiculed by others. But to me, my children are worth it. I do not want to stand one day before God and have to admit that I did not do everything I could to train my children up in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

Tuesday Link Up

links

There are a lot of tutorials out there right now for fabric shopping bags. THIS BAG is not only beautiful (look at that YUMMY fabric!) but functional as well (love that shopping list and coupons holder!!!). She does not have a tutorial up YET, but hopefully will soon. Keep an eye out!!! :)

While we do not celebrate Halloween, we do like to carve pumpkins. Extreme Pumpkins looks like a great book to see if I can check out of the library!

I know garden planting time is almost over, but I just HAD to share these two posts. Composting and Worm Farming are two things you can do/start ANYTIME of the year. Starting now means rich soil come spring/planting time!!! Of course it is spring right now in Australia where these two posts come from. They are WELL worth the read.

And I am just the tiniest envious of this way cute cherry camper. She said more pics soon, so keep an eye out.

OK, so you know I love the Sew Mama Sew blog. They have a Boy's Clothes Tutorial Round-Up of FREE on-line tutorials for boys clothes!! Now if I could just save up enough money for those adorable patterns they sell!

And I am sure most all of you already know about Kelli's new magazine called Seasonal Delights! And it is FREE right now!! This is a beautiful magazine!
And lastly, I just love these cute little note cards!! I plan on doing these with the kids! (This is a GREAT idea for the letter making part of the TOD-KAH curriculum!) A great way to use up scraps of wrapping paper and/or scrapping paper. :) And while you are there check out the rest of her blog. It is really good!

MMP - Tea Party: Let Them Eat Cake!

I have had such a BLAST with this series! I hope it blesses you. I know that it has blessed me and helped remind me of some things **I** had forgotten! :) Be sure to scroll down to enter my giveaway from Tuesday!

(Pic of MM - 4yr at our tea. Kale is a wonderful garnish to use to serve salads and beans on - it is so curly, vibrant green and more hearty than lettuce.)

Food prep is another wonderful area to allow the children to participate. Look through tea books from the library and allow the girls to pick out what they would like to have. Keep in mind your theme (or lack of it for simplicity) and remind them of it. Here are some examples from the extravagant and fun to the simple and elegant:

All fans of Anne of Green Gables will remember the infamous Raspberry Cordial! I had always thought "I need to find a recipe for that...how fun it would be!" Well look no further! Recipes for SEVERAL different types of cordial! TOO FUN!!! This would be GREAT with/for the Avonlea Tea Party!!!

When we think of tea, we usually think of pretty pink roses and white everywhere, but what about a lovely fall tea?!?! I just love this! Those girls in warm clothing, the fallen leaves all around! And recipes too! Check it out! :) And check out this wonderful cabin woods tea!!

And I just LOVED this idea of a Sweet Tea. Look at those desserts and those colors! Desserts are really an easy thing for little girls to make. Especially the no bake ones! You can find LOTS of no bake recipes for desserts on the web.

One of the fellow Make Mine Pink Teas had a LOVELY afternoon tea with FRUIT! Check out how beautiful! I love the simple mug o' flowers! TOO CUTE! And what a wonderful idea to serve FRUIT! So many times we try to make things complicated by making mini-this and small that. Give your kids a melon baller and let them go at it! (And for fun, you can cut up a watermelon into a swan or a basket - this is especially great for older girls to try.) This is also the PERFECT theme for those unexpected guests you want to have to tea! Fruit is so easy --- especially strawberries! Why not make up some raw chocolate dip? 1/2 cup raw carob powder to 3/4 cup honey or raw agave nectar and stir. Fill small cups with a small amount of dip for each place setting. This is yummier than you think!

And probably the best and most important tea you can have. This sums it up perfectly!

And I am so thankful I found the Tea Party Girl who teaches you the art and beauty of the afternoon tea. Make sure you have some time (and a cup of tea!) to enjoy this in-depth blog!

And thanks to A Scrapbook of Inspiration for two WONDERFUL links:
Tea Parties For Children (previous link broken, click here for the archive)and Royal Tea Parties For Young Ladies.

And one more on Polite Table Behavior.

And as a favor to all who have joined in the blogsphere on the week of teas (either by hosting or by visiting), The wonderful ladies at What If...? have created a beautiful bookmark for everyone. (Edited note: the link for the bookmark is no longer working)

Thanks SO MUCH to Make Mine Pink for hosting this lovely week of teas!

MMP - Tea Party: Fancy Hats and White gloves

If you are coming here from the Make Mine Pink blog, WELCOME! I hope you will enjoy tea with me! :) Be sure to see previous posts. This is a week long tea! :) (And a giveaway too! Be sure to enter on Tuesday's post!) I have so enjoyed visiting the other teas!! Some of them are so very elegant while others are just plain FUN!!

Sometimes it is nice to come up with a theme, but it is not always necessary. Sometimes an unexpected guest comes over and you can invite them to tea! :) And without a theme, there is also no pressure on your guest to dress a certain way.

But it is oh so FUN to dress up! I love to collect fancy hats. You can find them at almost any thrift store. They are a bit more difficult to find at garage sales, but I have found a few. Fancy hats are so much fun! We wear them all the time (not just at our tea parties). Collecting them allows me to pick and choose which one to wear and which one to share! Imagine the fun your guests will have being able to pick a nice fancy hat to wear! While straw hats are nice, they seem to attract little feet which step on and break them easily. I highly encourage you to search out the fabric/ribbon/crocheted ones. There are also lots of free patterns on the web for you to make your own hat. (Pic of AA - 7yr)

You can also find those old bridesmaid dresses that no one ever got to wear again. Maybe you can fit in one or one of your guests can. But you can also allow your girls to wear them! And if you are a good seamstress (or know someone who is), you can alter the dress or make a new one! One of my friends has a daughter who made a dress for her sister using the skirt of one of these fancy dresses!

You can also find white gloves at most dollar stores now. I got a pair for each of my girls at the dollar store.

Of course, dressing up for tea is nice, but not if it is going to make your guests uncomfortable! Know who you are inviting and if they are the kind of person who would have the attire to dress up. And if not, then offer to let them borrow one of your dresses/hats, again, only if you know it will not offend them.

The main point of all this is not to show off. In fact, this can be used as an opportunity to teach them that beauty is the hidden person of the heart and not the outward adorning. But it is a good thing, especially in this day and age, to "walk feminine, talk feminine, smile and beguile feminine". In other words, it is important for our girls to LEARN TO BE FEMININE! And not just feminine, but modestly feminine - they need to learn to be ladies.

My girls get enough roughing around gardening, climbing trees, camping, hiking and the like. Dressing up for a tea party is a wonderful time/way to remind them of their femininity. And what a wonderful time to treat those shut-ins and elderly like ladies too. So even if you don't have the fancy dress, fancy hat and white gloves...encourage your girls and guests to dress up. Even if it is just for the party. :)

Tomorrow: Let Them Eat Cake!

MMP - Tea Party: Decorations and Favors

If you are coming here from the Make Mine Pink blog, WELCOME! I hope you will enjoy tea with me! :) Be sure to see Monday and Tuesdays post. This is a week long tea! :)

So many times when I used to think of a tea party, I used to think of all the pretty decorations. But don't think that has to break the bank. The best way I have found to decorate inexpensively is to allow your daughters to do it.

First, they need the practice. What better way for your child to learn than to do it herself? One day she will have a home of her own and need to know how to decorate it. And secondly, you have no idea how many nice and pretty things you have lying around the house that the girls have a way of finding that you never knew you had (or even thought was pretty) until you let three little girls go searching. LOL! :D

Allow her to pick out the flowers (real or silk) for the centerpiece and help her to arrange them. Talk about how you don't want the flowers too high because you want to be able to see each other across the table, so a small, basket full would be perfect. Maybe you can even look through a book at the library on flower arranging.

We recently bought a HUGE bag of silk flowers at a thrift store. We put them all in basket and allow the children to pull out for them and decorate up the table for tea or dinner. Here is the centerpiece we used for our tea. It was arranged by AA (7yr).

Once, when the repair man came over, my daughter covered the table in her favorite bed sheet, took a cup of water and cut flowers from the backyard and placed them in the cup. All for the repair man! LOL!!

Did she just say favorite bed sheet?

Yes, I did just say favorite bed sheet. :D Allow her to take her favorite bed sheet and use it for a cloth covering for the table. If it gets tea on it, it can be washed! And if nothing else, you can always buy another sheet. But the training and keeping your daughter's heart here is more important than the cost of any sheet.

Try not to limit your child here too much. Remember, the point is not to be perfect, the point is to encourage, teach and train her. Are you training her that perfection is more important than people? While we want it to look nice, and we want our children to do their best, perfection is not what we are aiming for. We are aiming to teach our children to do their best for God. And if my daughter sees God's beauty in the rosey bed sheets, and spreads it out smoothly on the table, accompanied by a small cup of flowers and does it to the best of her ability with the heart of a servant ... goal attained.

You can also encourage them to MAKE the decorations. Maybe they can make a nice quilt to cover the table, or crochet doilies to put under the sandwiches. Even those paper circles intertwined with one another strung up across the ceiling can be pretty AND make your child feel happy she accomplished and participated in something so beautiful.

White "Christmas" lights are a wonderful way to light up and bring ambiance to your party without a lot of cost (or the fire hazard of candles and children). You can always find these really cheap at the after Christmas sales (and sometimes even garage sales).

And everyone loves to take home a little gift, aka favors. My girls LOVE to give gifts to people who come to our house. They will actually fill up a small brown bag of items for our guest to take home with them. All things of their own, or things they have made. My daughter is currently learning to crochet and practiced her chain stitch by making necklaces for everyone. It was really nice! I still have mine (and my mom's). LOL!! :)

Also, it is so fun to create place settings!

For our place cards, we made these adorable crocheted dress bookmarks and printed out names and made them into scrolls (if my handwriting were better we would have hand written them). A place setting AND a favor in one! And about the elderly guest who can no longer read? Put a small magnet on the back for her fridge!

Don't know how to crochet and want some of these for your tea party? Just ask! I will be happy to do a custom order! Or check out my store to see if I have any in stock.

I hope you are enjoying this series as much as I am. It was truly a joy to do this with my girls and I love teaching them through something so fun and feminine. And I am so enjoying it with you!

Tomorrow: Fancy Hats and White Gloves

MMP - Tea Party: Hospitali-tea :)

If you are coming here from the Make Mine Pink blog, WELCOME! I hope you will enjoy tea with me! :)

Hospitality is a Christian virtue that has been all but forgotten.

"For many people, hospitality is practiced only to meet their own social needs. Sometimes it is a self-glorifying show to impress other's with one's home or entertainment skills. In contrast, Christian hospitality is humble, sacrificial service." - Alexander Strauch

I love the definition of hospitality. I love using the 1828 version of the Webster's Dictionary. Most all of it's definitions are defined by Scripture.

HOSPITAL'ITY, n. [L. hospitalitas.] The act or practice of receiving and entertaining strangers or guests without reward, or with kind and generous liberality.

It is so easy to get wrapped up in what we think hospitality is, that we give our children the wrong impression. I know that I grew up thinking hospitality was only acceptable if the house was spotless and you knew everyone coming and you only invited the right kind of people. And of course came the praises with showing off your house and collection of board games. And even then, hospitality was reserved for special occasions: birthday and holidays.

Now that I know that is not the kind of hospitality God wants me to show, it is my pleasure to show my daughters how God would have us be hospitable to one another. For in doing so, you might be entertaining angels...

Don't just invite kids to your tea party! While an all kid tea party is sweet and fun, there are plenty of shut-ins, widows, and elderly who would be so glad to come to your daughter's tea party! They need the love of Christ shown to them just as much as the little children do.

And don't allow a house that is in less than perfect condition keep you from hospitality! You can keep the tea to one room in your house that you clean. OR you can host the party on the front porch. OH how I wish we would bring back the front porch! Grab one of those tables you always see at garage sales for $1 (the round ones with three legs). Cover and bring out your chairs! :) You can also have it in your garden or in the backyard. (I will talk more about decorating tomorrow.)

I think a tea party is a wonderful way for children to learn to show Christian hospitality.

• Make sure to watch your guests cup to see if they need a refill/top off.
• Ask them about themselves and talk very little about your own self. (If you need help with this, as we all must learn before we can teach, allow your children to see you take interest in the lives of others. A great book to help you is 201 Great Questions by Jerry D. Jones.)
• Serve others before yourself.
• Respect your elders and respect others.
• Give glory and honor to God for His blessings (instead of taking credit for them yourself).

I so hope that you will take the time to plan a tea party with your girls and invite an elderly woman from church (or maybe an elderly neighbor that doesn't get out much).

Again, we cannot teach our daughters something we do not ourselves know. I was never taught hospitality. But here are a few books that will help teach you so you can teach your daughters:

The Hospitality Commands by Alexander Strauch
The Personal Touch: Encouraging Others Through Hospitality by Crabb
L'Abri by Edith Schaeffer
Hospitality With Confidence by Pittman
We Didn't Know They Were Angels: Hospitality Even When It's Inconvenient by Doris Greig
Be My Guest by Vivian Anderson Hall

AND one of my favorite
Open Heart, Open Home by Mains
I am giving away a copy of this wonderful book. To be entered, simply comment on this post that you want to be entered. Advertise on your blog, and get a second entry! Winner to be announced Saturday morning/afternoon. Entries accepted until winner announced.

Tomorrow: Decorating

MMP - Tea Party: The Cups and Saucers

I am so excited for a full week of tea parties!!!!

If you are coming here from the Make Mine Pink blog, WELCOME! I hope you will enjoy tea with me! :)

I am not sure what the others are doing, but being a mom of three little girls (and one boy who I am sure will get dragged into tea parties and dress-up by his sisters despite his protest), I am taking a different approach to the tea party. I hope you will indulge me.

I want to share ways to have fun tea parties with your children, teaching them grace and responsibility, without breaking the bank! :)

First, you need to have the tea set! :)

I used to buy all the plastic tea party sets. And while those are cute and fine, I really started feeling like I wanted MORE for my daughters. The plastic tea sets were played with a lot at first, but even with my encouragement, the tea parties waned and I found myself looking for something more. Especially after reading this article about teaching responsibility using a real tea set.

What better way to train up your daughter to have a proper tea party than with a proper tea set?! :)

Now I am not saying to go out and buy a tea set. That would be way too expensive. And who says that it all has to match perfectly? A friend of my mother's has a different cup and saucer for each guest at her table. Having tea with her was so fun! There was a story behind each place setting! It was so fun to hear the stories behind each tea cup as we drank tea!

So what I have started doing is shopping for tea cups and saucers with my girls. They are only 7yr, 5yr and 4 yr, but it is so FUN to see them get so excited about tea cups! We mostly shop garage sales, thrift stores and recently I started taking my oldest to the antique stores. I can just imagine a few years from now, all us girls sitting around the table drinking tea and talking about how much fun we had buying such and such cup at the antique store! :)

I know that it is also scary to allow your children to hold REAL cups and saucers (compared to plastic), but I cannot tell you the pride and joy they have on their face as they accomplish holding and having tea like a Mommy!! And they are being trained to be responsible young ladies.

So even if you do not have a tea set passed down to you from your grandma, or an expensive set you bought, remember you can still have a very beautiful (though very shabby chic) tea set one cup and saucer at a time. :)

Tomorrow: Teaching Our Daughters Hospitali-TEA! :)

Rule to live by and Lavendar Beauty

Rule to live by:
"If you want a golden rule that will fit everybody, this is it: Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful."

William Morris

HT: Gracious Hospitality - where I got the quote from.

Also, she has a WONDERFUL tutorial on making lavender wands! And look at those lavender fields! OH I so wish we had one of those here!

HT: Ladies Finishing School - if you have not checked out the finishing school yet, it is a must.

AND a dear friend of mine has recently started blogging again (YEAH!)! She has posted about lavender and the many uses (including medicinal) as well as a recipe for lavender hand sanitizer! SO COOL! Thanks Brenda!

Beatrix Potter Party

I really am not up to throwing a party anytime soon, BUT this sounds SO COOL!

Head over and check out the details on how you can participate in

A Beatrix Potter Birthday Tea Party

(I thought of you Nancy when I saw this!) :-D

And while there, check out this AMAZING page. I know I say that a lot, and so it prolly loses it's emphasis. But this page, if you have daughters, if one that should be on your daily reads.

In Beauty and In Grace

She also has Beauty and Grace Academy

both are extremely excellent.

(Be sure to check out the Modest Handmaidens Essay Contest)

Girls Craft Club

Creative Girls Club

This sounds so cute! And not too bad of a price. Has anyone joined it or know anything about it? They mail projects to your door for your daughter and it has everything they need to make a craft. One comes every six weeks.

Maybe you could start something similar in your homeschooling/neighborhood group? Each Momma picks a craft and then puts the materials in a ziploc baggie. She creates enough for each girl in the group to have one (you know that it is cheaper to buy the materials to make several of one thing than to buy a whole bunch of different objects for a whole bunch of different crafts). Then you could meet once a month at someone's house to do the projects in the baggies! Make sure to meet at different houses so not one Momma is swamped with clean up after. :-D

Oriental Trading Company has some GREAT deals on group crafts. And they have some GREAT Christian crafts (especially around Christmas and Easter). AND if you each place your order at the same time (one mom pays for one craft, another mom for another, etc.). Then you save on shipping too!

This would also be a great time to get some projects for the TOD-KAH (Training Our Daughters to be Keepers At Home) in. Meet together and have everyone work on their crochet or knitting project. If they are sewing/quilting by hand, thy can have a session to work on that. Maybe if someone you know knows how to do something neat and special (like spinning wool into yarn, making cards, stamping, etc.) then one of the sessions can be for that too! :^)

I would love to hear other ideas anyone has for crafts for girls groups. What is a craft that can be put in a ziploc baggie?
-bracelet making (beads or even pony beads, string or wire)
-small baby doll quilt (fabric, thread, needle)
-button bracelets (this is especially good if you find a ton of old ones at a garage/estate sale - buttons, needle, thread)
-candle (beeswax, wick, glass holder)
-spool dolls
-macramé bracelts