Saturday, March 11, 2006

Husbands

When I first became a Christian, I remember reading lots of books on marriage. I wanted to have a really great marriage. I remember reading a lot of stuff that I should do. And I remember reading a lot of stuff that my husband should do. He should "love me as Christ loved the Church." And be "sensitive to my needs." And he was to be a strong, spiritual leader. He should do the manly things around the house.

All this caused me to become so discontent with my husband!

A very wise and godly woman once shared a book with a friend of mine and said "there are parts in this book which talk about what a husband is supposed to do - they are clearly labeled for the husband. Do not read those chapters."

And I took the advice as my own too. I have now stopped reading books or chapters in books that talk specifically about what the husband is supposed to do. I read what I am supposed to do. And I change myself.

And you know what?? Not only did I stop being discontent with my husband, but I became joyful and blessed to be his wife!

I realized that I was NOT created to be the Holy Spirit in my husband's life. And the less I criticized him and longed for him to be those things I read he should be and started be thankful for who he is the better our marriage became. I realized that I expected so much of my husband, and yet was so unwilling to expect the same of myself (all those changes the Bible said I was supposed to do and didn't).

I also realized that there are no "manly" jobs. I mean, how many women would love for their man to help out with the housework or cook them a meal (those things are considered feminine)?? And why should I sit around and pout all day because my husband did not take out the trash (a job considered a manly thing to do)? It only causes resentment and bitterness!! So now I take out the trash (and it so blesses my husband AND our marriage) with a joyful heart.

I am so thankful for this wise woman's advice to my friend. My marriage and my LIFE is better because of it!!

I hope that this encourages you.

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